Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
