I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize
