I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize