did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
