her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Randomize