All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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