Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
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