Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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