i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
