so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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