1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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