hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
