Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
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