having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Walk of Shame today included voting.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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