Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
