RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize