I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize