the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
