Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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