Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
This toilet bowl is my home.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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