I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
No subtext here. People are naked.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
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