That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
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We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
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Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I pour the whiskey from now on