If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
