Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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