So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
