Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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