found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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