OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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