The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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