I want to have your abortion
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Randomize
