If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
