Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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