Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
