Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I pour the whiskey from now on
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
