Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
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