What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
