I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
