bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
