The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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