What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
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so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
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I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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