I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
