69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
