how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
