Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
