so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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