The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize