i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
