I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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