I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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