I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize