I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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